"I cheated because I was really dissatisfied with our relationship and didn’t feel seen or understood by my partner. I confessed immediately afterwards, and today, my ex remains one of my oldest friends. Looking back, I wish I’d had the emotional intelligence at the time to tell him how I felt or break up with him. -Taylor C., 23*
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“I had been dating my boyfriend for about a year, and I was feeling neglected, unloved, and a bit unwanted. When I’m happy and in love, being faithful is easy. When I’m not, I start to consider alternative avenues. The guy I cheated with was an older man who lived and worked in my neighborhood. He’d been pursuing me for almost two years, and he was so sweet. He paid close attention to me. Maybe my cheating was a passive-aggressive way of retaliating and releasing the frustrations I had with my then-partner, but it definitely wasn’t worth it. The sex wasn’t even good. My partner never found out, and we eventually broke up because we always fought and weren’t happy. I can’t say that I won’t ever cheat again because I can’t predict the future. I didn’t feel guilty about it, and I still don’t.” -Aliya B.
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“I’ve been with my current boyfriend for almost 10 years, but I cheated on him when we’d been together for about four years. I didn’t feel like I was getting enough attention from him, and I’d met this other guy through work. He was willing to give me attention, and we had this deeply emotional attraction that went far beyond a physical connection. I stayed at his place one night, and we made out a lot but didn’t sleep together. He told me he loved me, and while being doted on is great, it was also a little too much too soon. I realized I would have been throwing away years in a solid relationship for this fast-moving thing that was a total crapshoot. And you know what? That guy got married about two years after professing his love for me. That fast-paced type of relationship is not me. Love is built over time, not in a one-night stand, no matter how deep the emotional connection. I realized that by jumping into something else, I wouldn’t be giving my long-term relationship a fair chance. After I told him, we decided we needed to try and figure out our problems. In the end, I don’t regret it because it was a wake-up call for my boyfriend and me to really figure out what we both needed from each other and how we could be better. Now, we’re both more secure with ourselves individually, which makes us more secure in our relationship. I’ve also realized that our relationship will never be perfect, and most aren’t, so instead of trying to be perfect, we just have to try to be the best we can for each other.” -Claire T.
Lidac78
